What a critical question Jesus asked His disciples, “But who do you say I am?” This question came immediately after Jesus had first asked, “Who do people say I am?” Matthew 16:13-19 (Emphasis mine)
It was not enough for Jesus’ disciples to stand on the opinions of who the people thought Jesus was – neither the good opinions nor the bad opinions. Jesus needed them to personally know and decide who He was. When Peter responded to Jesus’ question by declaring that He was the Messiah, the Son of the Living God, Jesus declared that Peter could not have known that information from natural understanding; it could only be known by revelation from the Father. Jesus’ identity as the Messiah was a truth that came directly from the Father to Peter, not from any person or natural insight. It requires faith to take a stand on that still, small, inner voice of the Holy Spirit, especially when many are saying and believing something completely contrary.
What other people tell us about God must be vetted through the Word of God as well as our own personal knowledge and experience with Him. We will never know God well or have strong Godly conviction, if we “ride on the coattails” of other teachers, pastors, prophets, writers or speakers instead of investing the time and devotion to find Him and know Him ourselves.
Receiving and living by the beliefs and convictions of other people without seeking and receiving directly from God has far reaching negative consequences. Ungodly soul-ties are formed when we receive from people, the things that we should receive only from God, and when we give over to others, aspects of ourselves that are intended to be worked out between us and God alone. For example, if a husband persuades his wife to trust and follow his convictions about how to understand the Bible or how to parent their children and the wife ignores her personal convictions and silently follows her husband without trying to give her honest input and opinion, she has given up what God has placed inside of her in favor of following her husband; and the husband has persuaded his wife to put him first, instead of encouraging her to hear from God and speak out what she has heard from God. These ungodly soul-ties are formed most often in our closest and most valued relationships such as: parent/child, husband/wife, boyfriend/girlfriend, leader/subordinate, teacher/student.
The pattern I just described can appear as Godly submission or peacemaking when it is actually fearing man more than fearing God. It is an aspect of a relational pattern that psychologists describe as co-dependency. Ungodly soul-ties, co-dependency, people pleasing, fear of man are all ways of describing a similar relational phenomenon. No matter what you call it, the result will be the same. We will be living and acting based on what we have heard others say and not out of our own sought out, deep, inner convictions between us and God. We will end up speaking and living as someone else wants us to live and the Holy Spirit will take second place, third place or even less of a role in leading us. Living that way will keep us from knowing God in a deep personal way, and usually leads to feeling empty inside and many times resentful towards the people we blindly follow.
Do you want to know God primarily through other people, or directly through revelation that comes from your seeking with all your heart until you find Him and He is found by you? Jeremiah 29:12-14
Lord, please show me ways that I have relied on the words or faith of others instead of diligently seeking to know You for myself; and give me the courage to stand with You no matter who agrees or disagrees with me.
Written By: Barry Byrne